On my mind

Today is a rough day for me... seems like I'm having a lot of them lately.  Today is particularly hard for a couple of reasons. 

Today would have been my mom's 62nd birthday.  I miss her every day...what a wonderful woman she was- the best mom anyone could ever ask for.  I have been thinking about her a lot lately, mostly because I wish I could have one of our phone calls where I complain and cry about everything going on in my life and she fixes it all by saying just the right thing.  And a hug, a hug from her would be amazing right now.  I love you mom, happy birthday.

Today also would have been our due date for our second pregnancy.  The day I found out I was pregnant was the anniversary of my mom's passing. When I went home and calculated what my due date would be online I was in awe when the date January 23 came up.  I thought....this is the one- this is really going to happen.  My mom is up there in heaven looking down on us and giving us this huge flashing sign of hope.  I know due dates are rarely right but this just seemed like it was meant to be.  Unfortunately, it wasn't.

I had a good cry when I woke up and Steve made it all a little better with a hug and his sweet, concerned face asking if there's anything he can do.  I love that man more than anything in this world, everything is easier when he's with me.  This is how I know in my heart that one day very soon we will be parents...the world would be too unfair if Steve wasn't a father.  He was born to do be a dad.

Bridget