What a difference a year makes.... last New Years I was ready to throw 2010 in the trash and start over. This year, I look back happily at 2011 because we brought home our baby girl and I learned so many things about myself.
~ I am stronger than I give myself credit for. I can give myself injections, get blood taken 3 times a week, carry a baby to term and even give birth.
~ I am a good mom. At least I think I am and that's all that matters, right? If Emily is crying, 9 times out of 10, I am the one who can calm her down.
~ I can move 10 hours from my family and friends and be ok. I miss everyone terribly, but as long as I have Steve and Emily- I am happy.
~ I can go into public with spit up on my shirt, no makeup, and greasy hair and not give a shit (this is probably because of sleep deprivation but whatever).
~ I can function on 2 hours of sleep if my baby needs me to.
As I sit here on the eve of 2012, I look forward to the new year and I can't wait to see what it will bring for our family.
Happy 2012 everyone!
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 30, 2011
2 month appointment
First off, thank you to everyone who commented and emailed me about yesterdays post. Your support never ceases to amaze me.
We had the dreaded 2 month vaccination appointment yesterday and all in all, things went pretty well.
Emily was all smiles and coos at the Dr which I loved to see. She weighs 13 lbs 1 oz (93rd percenile) is 24.3 inches long (96th percentile) and her head circumference is 39.5cm (80th percentile) I guess I shouldn't have been all that worried about her not getting enough food, right?
The Dr believes her reflux isn't being treated properly with the medicine she is currently on (prevacid) so he is switching her to zantac. We will start that in a couple of days. He thinks this is why she has trouble breathing out of her nose and is fussy after feedings.
He mentioned her crooked neck and told us to start working on it at home with lots of tummy time and manually stretching her neck to the other side. Apparently a helmet could be needed if this isn't corrected because her head will start to flatten on the side she is always laying on. He said a physical therapist might be a good idea.
Then came the shots....terrible. She was so happy until that first needle went in- her face went from smiley to shock, anger and pain in about 2 seconds. She screamed bloody murder until I was able to pick her up and hold her. She finally calmed down and was so worked up that she just went right to sleep in my arms.
Poor baby girl.
We had the dreaded 2 month vaccination appointment yesterday and all in all, things went pretty well.
Emily was all smiles and coos at the Dr which I loved to see. She weighs 13 lbs 1 oz (93rd percenile) is 24.3 inches long (96th percentile) and her head circumference is 39.5cm (80th percentile) I guess I shouldn't have been all that worried about her not getting enough food, right?
The Dr believes her reflux isn't being treated properly with the medicine she is currently on (prevacid) so he is switching her to zantac. We will start that in a couple of days. He thinks this is why she has trouble breathing out of her nose and is fussy after feedings.
He mentioned her crooked neck and told us to start working on it at home with lots of tummy time and manually stretching her neck to the other side. Apparently a helmet could be needed if this isn't corrected because her head will start to flatten on the side she is always laying on. He said a physical therapist might be a good idea.
Then came the shots....terrible. She was so happy until that first needle went in- her face went from smiley to shock, anger and pain in about 2 seconds. She screamed bloody murder until I was able to pick her up and hold her. She finally calmed down and was so worked up that she just went right to sleep in my arms.
Poor baby girl.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Breastfeeding
Will I ever figure this out?? This post is going to be a bit of a brain dump and if you have any suggestions at all- I am all ears, seriously.
Ok let's start at the beginning- if you've been reading for any period of time, you know Emily had/has reflux and colic. This made breastfeeding hard because I began to feel like I was causing these problems. She would scream when she ate, after she ate, when she wasn't eating. If I was holding her, she would cry for the boob- all. the. time. She never slept because she was always crying. She had gas so I tried to quit eating dairy, gassy veggies, tomatoes, etc. I felt like I couldn't eat anything and worried all the time that I was causing her to be in this much pain. Any time she nursed she would let the milk run out the side of her mouth and I would end up with a lap full of milk at the end. I wasn't sure if this was a latch problem or just her being lazy. But again, I was worried that she wasn't getting enough food because she always seemed hungry.
So I caved, I started giving her formula. She ate it with no problem but still wanted to nurse, so we did both. Mostly nursing during the day and giving formula at night.
Then the move came and my supply basically went away. She wanted to nurse but I didn't think she was getting enough so I gave her more and more formula until that was all she was getting. I felt terrible, and I still do because I feel like she wants to nurse.
Now that she has been strictly on formula she is even more gassy and has cradle cap and red, dry bumps on her face. I'm not sure if this is related to formula?
So, my questions are:
~ Can I get my supply back? I still feel the tingling every once in awhile when she is really crying and if I squeeze, drops of milk will come out. (TMI, sorry.) How can I go about doing this? More pumping, taking something? Have any of you done this?
~ If I can get my supply back what do I do about her letting milk spill out of her mouth?
~ Should I just stick to formula and try soy based to see if it makes her less gassy? Do any of you have a formula that you think is great in this situation? We have tried the "gentle" formula from both similac and enfamil, both make her gassy. Side note: When she eats from a bottle she makes a loud clicking noise with her tongue, we can't figure out how to stop this and I wonder if that is what is causing her gas issue? We use avent bottles, is there a kind that might be better?
Ok let's start at the beginning- if you've been reading for any period of time, you know Emily had/has reflux and colic. This made breastfeeding hard because I began to feel like I was causing these problems. She would scream when she ate, after she ate, when she wasn't eating. If I was holding her, she would cry for the boob- all. the. time. She never slept because she was always crying. She had gas so I tried to quit eating dairy, gassy veggies, tomatoes, etc. I felt like I couldn't eat anything and worried all the time that I was causing her to be in this much pain. Any time she nursed she would let the milk run out the side of her mouth and I would end up with a lap full of milk at the end. I wasn't sure if this was a latch problem or just her being lazy. But again, I was worried that she wasn't getting enough food because she always seemed hungry.
So I caved, I started giving her formula. She ate it with no problem but still wanted to nurse, so we did both. Mostly nursing during the day and giving formula at night.
Then the move came and my supply basically went away. She wanted to nurse but I didn't think she was getting enough so I gave her more and more formula until that was all she was getting. I felt terrible, and I still do because I feel like she wants to nurse.
Now that she has been strictly on formula she is even more gassy and has cradle cap and red, dry bumps on her face. I'm not sure if this is related to formula?
So, my questions are:
~ Can I get my supply back? I still feel the tingling every once in awhile when she is really crying and if I squeeze, drops of milk will come out. (TMI, sorry.) How can I go about doing this? More pumping, taking something? Have any of you done this?
~ If I can get my supply back what do I do about her letting milk spill out of her mouth?
~ Should I just stick to formula and try soy based to see if it makes her less gassy? Do any of you have a formula that you think is great in this situation? We have tried the "gentle" formula from both similac and enfamil, both make her gassy. Side note: When she eats from a bottle she makes a loud clicking noise with her tongue, we can't figure out how to stop this and I wonder if that is what is causing her gas issue? We use avent bottles, is there a kind that might be better?
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
After Christmas Wrap Up
I am so behind on my blogging!
~ My sweet Emily turned 2 months old on Christmas! She is getting so big and she is strong! She cries much less, usually only when she is hungry, gassy, or overly tired. Her personality continues to amaze me- she is very vocal and loves to "talk". She slept 8 hours straight last night. It was very nice, but I woke up at 3:00am and I was worried!
~ The Lost Stork is 1 year old! I started blogging on Christmas last year at my in-laws house, what a difference a year makes. We were just beginning IVF and now we have a beautiful baby girl. I am beyond grateful for so many things- IVF science, this community, my family and friends, and of course my supportive husband.
~ We are getting settled into our new house and Steve started work with his dad today. I am so proud of him and I am so happy that we are taking on this new adventure together.
I hope you all had a wonderful holiday!
~ My sweet Emily turned 2 months old on Christmas! She is getting so big and she is strong! She cries much less, usually only when she is hungry, gassy, or overly tired. Her personality continues to amaze me- she is very vocal and loves to "talk". She slept 8 hours straight last night. It was very nice, but I woke up at 3:00am and I was worried!
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| 2 months old! Look at that belly! |
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| our favorite Christmas present |
~ The Lost Stork is 1 year old! I started blogging on Christmas last year at my in-laws house, what a difference a year makes. We were just beginning IVF and now we have a beautiful baby girl. I am beyond grateful for so many things- IVF science, this community, my family and friends, and of course my supportive husband.
~ We are getting settled into our new house and Steve started work with his dad today. I am so proud of him and I am so happy that we are taking on this new adventure together.
I hope you all had a wonderful holiday!
Thursday, December 22, 2011
I'm still here!
Is it Thursday? I honestly don't know what day or time it is since the move.
First off, I want to apologize for my lack of commenting, I've been reading all of your blogs on my phone and there has been some huge stuff happening in blog-land in the past week! I am going to try to go back and catch up one of these days...
We made it to Pennsylvania! It took us two days to get here but we made it! Emily did great in the car and our house is awesome (we saw it for the first time when we arrived on Tuesday). A huge thanks to our parents for helping us load everything up and for getting everything ready for us to move right in- you guys are the best! All of our new neighbors helped us unload the truck and we even got a homemade meal brought to us on our first night here. What a great place to live!
We are slowly but surely getting everything unpacked and put away. Our tree is up and our stockings are hung, we are so blessed this Christmas.
First off, I want to apologize for my lack of commenting, I've been reading all of your blogs on my phone and there has been some huge stuff happening in blog-land in the past week! I am going to try to go back and catch up one of these days...
We made it to Pennsylvania! It took us two days to get here but we made it! Emily did great in the car and our house is awesome (we saw it for the first time when we arrived on Tuesday). A huge thanks to our parents for helping us load everything up and for getting everything ready for us to move right in- you guys are the best! All of our new neighbors helped us unload the truck and we even got a homemade meal brought to us on our first night here. What a great place to live!
We are slowly but surely getting everything unpacked and put away. Our tree is up and our stockings are hung, we are so blessed this Christmas.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Saying goodbye
Only 8 days until we move.
This week will be spent seeing friends and saying goodbye. Over the years, these awesome people have seen me through some very hard times; bad relationships, the passing of my mother, and my miscarriages. They have also been there to celebrate with me; meeting Steve, getting engaged, getting married, and of course successful IVF and Emily's birth. We have laughed and cried together and shared many ups and downs. These are the best friends a person could have and I thank my lucky stars that they are mine. I am going to miss you all very much.
Then comes my family. We will be celebrating Christmas on the 17th and it will be so bittersweet. I will be overjoyed to celebrate Emily's first Christmas with my family but sad that we will be saying goodbye. I will miss my family more than I can say- their support and love mean the world to me and have made me who I am today. I love you all so much!
This week will be spent seeing friends and saying goodbye. Over the years, these awesome people have seen me through some very hard times; bad relationships, the passing of my mother, and my miscarriages. They have also been there to celebrate with me; meeting Steve, getting engaged, getting married, and of course successful IVF and Emily's birth. We have laughed and cried together and shared many ups and downs. These are the best friends a person could have and I thank my lucky stars that they are mine. I am going to miss you all very much.
Friday, December 9, 2011
TGIF
It's been a long week in this house! I'm happy the weekend is here even though we will spend most of it trying to juggle Emily and packing.
I didn't get to TVT yesterday so I guess this would be TVF (Thought Vomit Friday)....
{1} We took Em to see Santa this week. It's her first Christmas, how could I pass up taking her to the mall to have her picture taken?? She was so sleepy. (side note: the young man taking the pictures smelled like a combination of BO and cigarettes, awesome.)
{2} I am tired of pet hair. No matter how much I vacuum it still ends up on Emily and it drives me crazy. If you have any tips for lessening pet hair- do tell.
{3} Speaking of pets, Emily noticed Sadie (our dog) for the first time last night. She stared and stared and watched everywhere she went. So cute.
{4} It's not feeling or looking much like Christmas at our house....I keep seeing all of your Christmas tree pictures and I wish I had mine up! I am just hoping we get our tree up before Christmas day in our new house. It will be so fun to decorate and listen to Christmas music with Emily and Steve, I am so looking forward to that.
{5} I am in love with smartwool socks. They are perfectly warm and cute and everyone should have at least one pair. I also really really want one of their cardigans but they are soooo expensive (a girl can dream).
{6} So sweet.
{7} Steve and I love this chicken pot pie recipe. Make it, I promise you'll like it too.
I didn't get to TVT yesterday so I guess this would be TVF (Thought Vomit Friday)....
{1} We took Em to see Santa this week. It's her first Christmas, how could I pass up taking her to the mall to have her picture taken?? She was so sleepy. (side note: the young man taking the pictures smelled like a combination of BO and cigarettes, awesome.)
{2} I am tired of pet hair. No matter how much I vacuum it still ends up on Emily and it drives me crazy. If you have any tips for lessening pet hair- do tell.
{3} Speaking of pets, Emily noticed Sadie (our dog) for the first time last night. She stared and stared and watched everywhere she went. So cute.
{4} It's not feeling or looking much like Christmas at our house....I keep seeing all of your Christmas tree pictures and I wish I had mine up! I am just hoping we get our tree up before Christmas day in our new house. It will be so fun to decorate and listen to Christmas music with Emily and Steve, I am so looking forward to that.
{5} I am in love with smartwool socks. They are perfectly warm and cute and everyone should have at least one pair. I also really really want one of their cardigans but they are soooo expensive (a girl can dream).
{6} So sweet.
{7} Steve and I love this chicken pot pie recipe. Make it, I promise you'll like it too.
Ingredients
- 1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cubed
- 2 cups frozen mixed veggies
- 1/3 cup butter
- 1/3 cup chopped onion
- 1/3 cup all-purpose flour
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
- 1/4 teaspoon celery seed
- 1 3/4 cups chicken broth
- 2/3 cup milk
- 2 (9 inch) unbaked pie crusts
Directions
1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C.)
2. In a saucepan, combine chicken and frozen veggies. Add water (or leftover chicken broth) to cover and boil for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, drain and set aside.
3. In the saucepan over medium heat, cook onions in butter until soft and translucent. Stir in flour, salt, pepper, and celery seed. Slowly stir in chicken broth and milk. Simmer over medium-low heat until thick. Remove from heat and set aside.
4. Place the chicken mixture in bottom pie crust. Pour hot liquid mixture over. Cover with top crust, seal edges, and cut away excess dough. Make several small slits in the top to allow steam to escape.
5. Bake in the preheated oven for 30 to 35 minutes, or until pastry is golden brown and filling is bubbly. Cool for 10 minutes before serving.
Linking up with E Tells Tales
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
6 weeks postpartum
I had my 6 week follow up visit with my midwife and left her office *almost* in joyful tears.
It was so good to see her again and she was so happy to see Emily. She sees a ton of patients a day and delivers a ton of babies, but she remembered my delivery and our background of losses and IVF and we talked about it while she checked me out. I'm so thankful I had her deliver our baby.
At the end of my visit she gave me a huge hug and wished us the best with our move, then she ran and got one of her nurses to show off Emily's hair.
I felt emotional (in a good way) being there with Emily. I thought about all of my appointments with her growing away in my belly and how nervous and excited I was. I remember the day we went in and set up my induction like it was yesterday.
I can't believe she is 6 weeks old already, where does the time go?
It was so good to see her again and she was so happy to see Emily. She sees a ton of patients a day and delivers a ton of babies, but she remembered my delivery and our background of losses and IVF and we talked about it while she checked me out. I'm so thankful I had her deliver our baby.
At the end of my visit she gave me a huge hug and wished us the best with our move, then she ran and got one of her nurses to show off Emily's hair.
I felt emotional (in a good way) being there with Emily. I thought about all of my appointments with her growing away in my belly and how nervous and excited I was. I remember the day we went in and set up my induction like it was yesterday.
I can't believe she is 6 weeks old already, where does the time go?
Monday, December 5, 2011
my crafty sister
Everyone should go check out my sister Kelsey's new etsy shop!
She is making Christmas stockings and after the new year she will be making American Girl doll clothes.
Here is an example- so cute!
While we are on the subject of craftiness, I am newly addicted to pinterest. There are so many good ideas out there and it makes me wish I was just a tad more creative!
She is making Christmas stockings and after the new year she will be making American Girl doll clothes.
Here is an example- so cute!
While we are on the subject of craftiness, I am newly addicted to pinterest. There are so many good ideas out there and it makes me wish I was just a tad more creative!
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Probiotics and Chiropractic
I'm knocking on wood as I type this post.
For the past week, Emily has turned a corner- a less-colicky, awesome, smiling baby corner.
I can't be 100% sure, but I think this change in her is due to 1) me taking probiotics (thank you Courtney for the suggestion) and 2) taking her to the chiropractor.
Since Emily was born, she kept her head tilted at a very strange angle any time she was laying or sitting in her car seat- it looked so uncomfortable! The chiropractor did a thermal scan on her spine and found that her poor little neck was out of alignment along with another spot in her mid-back. Now don't freak out, they don't adjust her like they would you or me. It's mostly a lot of stretching and massage. She loves it and her neck is slowly but surely straightening out and she seems so much happier!
I started taking probiotics last week and I noticed a change in Emily within a week. She was much less fussy at night and didn't scream like she was in pain anymore. Don't get me wrong, she still cries, but it is so much better than it was.
Here is an article if you're interested.
And now let's all knock on wood.
For the past week, Emily has turned a corner- a less-colicky, awesome, smiling baby corner.
I can't be 100% sure, but I think this change in her is due to 1) me taking probiotics (thank you Courtney for the suggestion) and 2) taking her to the chiropractor.
Since Emily was born, she kept her head tilted at a very strange angle any time she was laying or sitting in her car seat- it looked so uncomfortable! The chiropractor did a thermal scan on her spine and found that her poor little neck was out of alignment along with another spot in her mid-back. Now don't freak out, they don't adjust her like they would you or me. It's mostly a lot of stretching and massage. She loves it and her neck is slowly but surely straightening out and she seems so much happier!
I started taking probiotics last week and I noticed a change in Emily within a week. She was much less fussy at night and didn't scream like she was in pain anymore. Don't get me wrong, she still cries, but it is so much better than it was.
Here is an article if you're interested.
And now let's all knock on wood.
Friday, December 2, 2011
Amazingness
This was my day yesterday....I'm so in love.
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| so peaceful |
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| Sadie is never far away from Em |
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| loving playtime |
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| oh the hair! |
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| hold on tight little one |
Thursday, December 1, 2011
TVT
It's that time of week...TVT!
* Ok ladies- I am in need of recommendations for baby carriers. We have tried the baby bjorn- she doesn't like it and it's really hard to get on! Moby- I've tried it a few times and she squirms like she doesn't have enough room and ends up crying like she's in pain. Are there any other good carriers out there that you would recommend?
* Emily has gotten back to regular naps and sleeping periods at night. It seems like any time we take her out of the house to run errands or appointments she gets thrown off track and wants to stay awake for long periods of time. I think the excitement of Thanksgiving may have been part of the reason she didn't want to sleep.
* Still haven't started packing.....18 days until the big move! We have so much to get done in such a short amount of time, I'm trying not to panic.
* We had Emily's baptism last Sunday and it went really well. She looked so cute in her little gown and slept through most of it. Our families were there and it was great to see everyone!
* The past two nights we have given Emily a bottle of sensitive stomach formula instead of breast milk and she slept much longer and didn't cry! I'm trying to decide if I should switch to formula full time or just at night. She really loves nursing for comfort and I don't think I'm ready to give that up.
* Ok ladies- I am in need of recommendations for baby carriers. We have tried the baby bjorn- she doesn't like it and it's really hard to get on! Moby- I've tried it a few times and she squirms like she doesn't have enough room and ends up crying like she's in pain. Are there any other good carriers out there that you would recommend?
* Emily has gotten back to regular naps and sleeping periods at night. It seems like any time we take her out of the house to run errands or appointments she gets thrown off track and wants to stay awake for long periods of time. I think the excitement of Thanksgiving may have been part of the reason she didn't want to sleep.
* Still haven't started packing.....18 days until the big move! We have so much to get done in such a short amount of time, I'm trying not to panic.
* We had Emily's baptism last Sunday and it went really well. She looked so cute in her little gown and slept through most of it. Our families were there and it was great to see everyone!
* The past two nights we have given Emily a bottle of sensitive stomach formula instead of breast milk and she slept much longer and didn't cry! I'm trying to decide if I should switch to formula full time or just at night. She really loves nursing for comfort and I don't think I'm ready to give that up.
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