When I planned for Emily's birth, I wanted to do it naturally. I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and it amazed me. It wasn't that I wanted a medal or praise for getting through childbirth without drugs, it was that I wanted to give birth in a way that so many women before me had. I wanted my body to do what I knew it could do and I wanted the experience of having my hormones bond me to my baby in the way that happens with natural birth.
Things didn't work out that way thanks to scar tissue on my cervix that wouldn't allow me to dilate. An epidural was needed so my midwife could break up the scar tissue or I would have ended up with a c-section.
I still bonded with my baby and even though my labor didn't go as I hoped it would, when I think back on it I have nothing but positive memories. If it were possible I would go back to the same hospital, with the same midwife, and the same doula. My birth team was awesome and Steve was fantastic. There was a lot of laughing and happiness in that room.
Since becoming pregnant this time, I've been going to an OB group. I loved the first Dr. I saw, he was kind, took his time and I felt comfortable. I've seen three other Drs since that visit and I haven't been a huge fan of them. My appointment last month was the one that made me re-think the practice. It was right after I had been feeling very down and I asked the Dr. about depression during pregnancy. She blew me off. I left there feeling disappointed. I came home and told Steve about the experience and we decided that we would look for a midwife and transfer.
We found a group of midwives in the area that deliver at a free standing birth center or at a local hospital. I have heard very good things about the birth center and one of our friends recently had her baby there. They have very strict guidelines about who can deliver at the center and they are extremely cautious. But at this point, we are planning on a hospital birth with the midwives. And after meeting one of them today I am so happy that we transferred. She spent an hour with me talking about my previous losses, Emily's pregnancy, this pregnancy, everything. They have an "open chart policy" which means, every time I go in I am handed my chart and allowed to look through it and see what notes were made in previous visits- I thought this was wonderful.
We have also chosen our doula. She is a Bradley Method childbirth instructor and she has been to over 100 births. I'm learning more about this method and I'm reading Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way. If any of you have used it successfully let me know!
The pieces are coming together for *hopefully* another amazing birth experience- only 109 days to go!